Proud Bator Blog – May is Masturbation Month

the month of may

Hey Bators it’s our month this month! May is Masturbation Month. If you didn’t know that then that’s cool, now you do. 

I’ve known it for a while, my mates know that I know it and a couple even remind me each month, even my non-bator mates. 

With each year it grows in popularity. While it’s not at the point where non-bators are talking about it, it’s not quite in the mainstream, even the fact that it’s getting talked about in the more ‘adult’ rated circles is a positive thing. 

I’ve talked before about the increase in sex positivity, in general, and in the kink communities. There has definitely been an increased acceptance of the breadth of people’s sexual interests and proclivities. However, masturbation has fallen behind in certain respects when it comes to acceptance as a sexual practice in and of itself. So I think Masturbation Month is hugely valuable to the bator community but also for the community at large. 

I won’t subject you to yet another rant about being bate proud and how we need to talk about it more. You’ve heard that a few times in recent episodes. But don’t forget it. Please. 

A different tack this time. A little history on Masturbation Month. 

The first ever Masturbation Day was declared by San Fransisco sex shop, Good Vibrations on May 7th 1994. This was in response to the sacking of US Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders. Sean and I discussed her sacking recently on an episode but the basic situation was that Elders, as Surgeon General, was asked about health and sex education in schools, a reasonable question for someone in her position. As part of her response, she suggested that masturbation be included more heavily in the curriculum. There was a pubic outcry coming from misunderstanding, as these outcries so often do, particularly from certain segments of the population in the USA. The misunderstanding being that Elders was suggesting that teens be taught how to masturbate when, if you look closer at her response and her clarification she was suggesting that by perhaps educating kids about the benefits of masturbation and helping to reduce the stigma around it, that kids might see it as a more acceptable release of their raging hormones rather than continuing the sexual practices that have resulted in increasingly alarming rates of teen pregnancy. Unfortunately, the misunderstanding won, the outcry was successful and President Clinton fired Joycelyn Elders. Ironically if he had taken her advice about masturbation as a safer way of sexual release maybe his term wouldn’t also have been cut short. 

Anyway, in response to this sacking, Good Vibrations down in the perenially and thankfully liberal city of San Fransisco declared May 7 to be Masturbation Day. Their aim being to “raise awareness and to highlight the importance of masturbation for nearly everyone: it’s safe, it’s healthy, it’s free, it’s pleasurable and it helps people get to know their bodies and their sexual responses. Of all the kinds of sex people can have, masturbation is the most universal and important, yet few people talk about it freely — worse, many people still feel it is “second best” or problematic in some way.” Gee, some of those words sound familiar. 

It was undoubtedly picked up quickly by bators and bate positive people. And even more quickly by other sex shops looking to sell dongs and pocket pussies. Here’s a quote from, In my admittedly one-handed research session I was unable to find information about how it shifted and grew from Masturbation Day to Masturbation Month, although I know we’re all glad that it did. The cynical side of me thinks it may have turned into a full month for the same reason that we see Black Friday sales on November 1st. It’s much easier for a store or website to have a sale that lasts a month than one that lasts a day. So many more customers to flog things off to, or onto. Another possibility is that the internet got a hold of the idea and decided that Masturbation needed to be celebrated for a longer period of time. 

Or the word nerd in me hopes it was a whole bunch of people who thought the alliteration of May is Masturbation Month is so much catchier. And it is, let’s be honest. 

So what’s the point? Why do we have a celebrated Masturbation Month? I see two main reasons, both beneficial and both important. 

For many, including lots of us in the discord server and I’m sure many of you listeners, it’s a chance or an excuse for more masturbation. By more masturbation I’ll refer back to my previous episode, it’s not just more by numbers. I know people that are committing to more regular, more often, more mindful, more timely, more engaged, more buddies, more orgasms, more toys, more porn, more imagination and many..more. Masturbation Month is an annual reminder for us to check in with ourselves about our own masturbatory habits. Whether we’re happy or not. Whether there’s an area we’d like to improve or hone in on. I also know a lot of people who set a goal for the month as a bit of extra fun around it. Mine is to make sure I give myself a good session every day. If you haven’t thought of yours or don’t have one it’s not too late. There’s still a chunk of Masturbation Month to go if you’re listening to this when it’s released. If not, then there’s always June which coincidentally is in Men’s Health Month. I mean, after a month of bating dudes are gonna be healthier right? I’ll save the deep dive into the health benefits for a future episode. 

Now, the one thing that Masturbation Month doesn’t quite have yet is the general following. I talked last year about No Nut November and how I saw it popping up on all my feeds, from Twitter to Discord to even Facebook. It came up in conversation in all of my social circles. It’s gone far past a Reddit thing and isn’t just a part of the NoFap movement or any little incel culture. It’s part of the male conversation. Lots of guys talk about it, most guys have heard of it, well, those below a certain age I expect. And bringing it up in conversation is unlikely to garner you any strange looks. While NNN is a bit of a joke it’s still brought up in general conversation. Masturbation Month isn’t quite there yet. As I said at the start it’s increasing in awareness in sexy circles but it hasn’t quite broken through to the mainstream. Maybe that’s because the stigma of having a wank makes people accept the No Nut more easily than the celebration of the solo orgasm but regardless, as I have in most of these episodes, that’s your task bators. To get out there and spread the word about Masturbation Month. Tell someone that might not know, wish someone a happy Masturbation Month, as I will. Spread the word a little. If you want to get serious follow it up with a reason for the invention of the celebration. It’s a good chance to have a chat about the importance of having an understanding of sex and sexuality and how the solo aspects of our sexual pleasure fit into the whole spectrum. 

One more thing before I wrap up and this is the best part of the whole thing for me because since 2005, International Masturbation Day has seemingly shifted from the 7th of May and is now celebrated on the 28th of May. Which just happens to be my birthday. So you could say, while I share my birthday with this momentous celebration I was destined to be a bator, a proud bator and someone who is spreading the word. 

Thanks for hitting up the Proud Bators Blog. I’d love to hear how you’re celebrating Masturbation Month, you can let me know on the Discord server or by leaving a comment on the blog post for the episode. Or shoot it through to Sean and I may even discuss them in our cohosted episode later this month.